Altruism has blown my mind and wrinkled my brain on every page. The insights flow…
What is ‘confidence’? That one word encompasses a variety of skills, beliefs, behaviors and thoughts.
Confidence is a temporary state of mind. It must be created every day. In this article, I will share a few strategies for developing confidence over time.
1. You’re Already Enough
You may think that you need to be someone other than you in order to have the life you want. That you have to become someone else. That’s a lie.
You can build your life right now. You are capable of creating the ideal life you want to live. You just have to decide what it is, in detail, and take the first step toward making it a reality.
The challenges that are in front of you are ones you’re ready for. Your long-term goals require only that you take the next step. You are able to take that next step now.
There’s always a ‘next step’, and it’ll be there until you take it. You can move forward now, or you can put it off for years before you work up the courage to do it. We’re better off if we just go for it now.
2. Become More of Who You Are
Stop thinking you need to ‘be the best’ in order to get what you want. That’s a non-specific goal that gets no results. Instead of trying to ‘be the best’, go after a different target.
Become more ‘you’ – more of who you already are, deep down. Work to become more authentically yourself, letting more aspects of your core character and personality shine through in your behavior and interactions.
Instead of trying to learn a skill because it’s a popular one to have, figure out what you have a natural talent for and double down on that. I’m not writing to make money or become famous. I’m writing because I enjoy doing it and I’m pretty good at it. Find something you have a deep level of enjoyment for, and do that!
3. Face Fears and Doubts
When you procrastinate on a task, you start to fear it. The more you put it off, the more you doubt your ability to complete it. Managing that fear and taking action anyway is key to accomplishing your goals.
Fear and confidence must coexist. Your level of confidence depends on how you react to fear. Moving toward what you fear is difficult, but essential for confidence. Once you start working on the task you were dreading, it turns out to be easier than expected. You are more capable than you thought. As you push through difficult moments and refuse to give up, your confidence in your ability grows.
4. Take Disciplined Action
Taking action creates confidence. Hesitation destroys confidence.
The longer you wait to do something, the more doubt builds up in your mind. Instead, use ‘The Three Second Rule’: just count down from 3, then take action. With this method, you think of something you need to do, think ‘3, 2, 1, go’ and get started on it right away.
This method will seem strange at first, but once you build it into a habit it’s a reliable way to minimize delay and save time. I also use a cube timer when I need to get something done fast. I’ll pick a task, set the timer for 5 to 45 minutes, and try to get that task done before the timer goes off.
5. Energize Your State
Confidence is a state of mind. You can increase your confidence at any moment by doing things that energize your mental and physical state.
When entering a new situation, ask yourself ‘what energy level am I showing up with?’ It’s easy to show up in a low-energy state, and we often do it automatically. To really bring enthusiasm and vibrancy to interactions, you have to make the conscious choice to energize your state ahead of time.
There are a lot of ways to energize your state. Some recommend yelling ‘YES’ over and over again, which does create a powerful state. And YES, it feels ridiculous. But feeling ridiculous is necessary to build confidence.
Here are some other options:
- Sing Along To Upbeat Songs
- Practice Wim Hof Breathing
- Go For A Run
- Take A Cold Shower
Confidence is a mental and physical state. It absorbs your whole mind and body. There are countless ways to increase confidence. The most effective is to be fully present in the moment.
Being fully present, you aren’t consciously thinking at all. You are in a state of flow, just saying and doing what shows up, with no filter. This is the state of true confidence.
To achieve this state more often, use these ideas:
- Know that you are capable of facing the challenge in front of you.
- Become the most ‘you’ you can possibly be.
- Choose to face rejection and experience discomfort
- Take bold action by using the 3 Second Rule
- Become fully present in this moment